I am just checking my email. I am so glad that people care about me and are actually watching out for me. I have been offered millions of dollars if I will send Barrister Michael in Nigeria a sum of $23,000 so he can pay the financial charges so millions can be released. He will split it with me. Where do I sign up for this, Mikey? I will receive this money just in time to accept that email offer to get my colon cleaned.
I will not be accepting the offer to have my breast enlarged since I am a man. I don't care much for man boobs. The offer for dates with black women is also out. I discussed it with my wife and she said no.
Bogus Bank and Trust Company wanted me to verify my bank account this morning. All they needed was my social security number and my bank account number to verify my account. I will be getting back to them this afternoon.
My next email is from my friend. It is the form of a prayer. She tells me I have send her email to a hundred and twenty four of my closest friends. If I don't It will mean I will get a boil on my ass for every person short of one twenty four and I will also burn in hell.
So far I am up to ninety one people.
My next email: well, I just took thirty nine minutes opening forwards of forwards and the end is not in sight. I think I will give up on this one. I hope it wasn't important.
The email heading made me kinda nervous. Something about "a matter of life and death".