Monday, July 20, 2009

Chosen for greatness? I think not.

I am a man of mystery. This has been my persona for many years. The problem with this philosophy is that nobody knows anything about me. So when I die, my obituary will be contained in nine words. Look what happened to the writer Trevanian. Many people knew Trevanian died, but very few knew about Rodney Whitaker. Do I want that to be my legacy? I decided I didn't want to go like Rod.
Some of my favorite characters were created by Trevanian; two of my favorite books were, "Eiger Sanction" and "Shibumi"; the characters have great names such as Nickalai Hel.
So I will use the meme or final answer format. short question! short answer.
  • Pepsi or Coke: can't have either (triglycerides)
  • Potato Salad or Macaroni Salad: umm! neither (too much sodium)
  • Baseball or Football: My shoulder is messed up for either one. (Rotator cuff!)
  • Read book or wait for movie: once again neither. (glaucoma and cataracts)
  • Coffee or Tea: They both make me hyper.
  • Swim: lessons or self taught?: Self taught. once I got out of the bag it was easy.
  • Beach or Pool: Neither, chlorine makes me itch. salt dries out my skin.
  • Weights or cardio machine: neither, bad hips, bad shoulder, recovering from hernia's (plural).
Section 2 (free association) a word/first thought to your mind.
  • Wife: keeps track of my medicine.
  • husband: stud muffin.(me!) hmmm...that's Wife agreeing with Husband)
  • Cat: allergies
  • Dog: fleas itching.
  • Vomit: frequently
  • Driving: my road rage.
  • Health: very healthy, a couple dings.
  • Favorite drink: pepto bismal
  • Favorite color: Pepto pink or Hershey squirt brown. (not at the same time)
  • Hot dog or hamburger: What a choice, cholesterol or cholesterol.
  • Favorite pastime: Reading Obituaries. check the age of people who died, add it up and take on average. If the average is lower than my current age I stay in bed the whole day.
Now you know a little bit about me. I am starting to establish a legacy. I would like to be remembered for something beside my phenomenal knowledge of turnips, and my earwax collection. Incidentally I have a life sculpture of Millard Fillmore's face made totally from earwax and toe cheese.
But that is another story.
Leave your legacy now! Not like these hippies below. These two probably ended up on skid row or incarcerated on a marijuana charge. Nothing good ever came of them, you can be sure.
Will you be remembered in 100 years? Not these hippies below.

A lot can happen in 100 years.

  • The average life expectancy was 47 years old.
  • The speed limit was 10 mph in most places.
  • There was 144 miles of paved roads in 1907.
  • Coffee was 15 cents per pound. No Starbuck's
  • Leading cause of death were pneumonia and flu.
  • Diarrhea was the third on the list.
  • Our country had only 45 states.
  • The population of Las Vegas was 30.
  • More people lived in Iowa than in California.
  • Only about 6% of American graduated from HS.
  • Marijuana, heroin, and morphine were available over the counter in drug stores.
  • There were 230 reported murders in the U.S. in the year 1907. Now it takes about 5 days to reach the same number.
Things change!!!!!!

Monday, July 6, 2009

Great photo's of the 20th Century or 19th.

I was cleaning the attic the other day when I came across a bunch of old photos, postcards and news clippings.
Some of them were photos from the 1950's and 60's. Some are very old. There were few that are metallic. I did a little research and this process was used between 1851 into the early 20th century. It was called
sadly, all of the old photos I have are undated and have no captions. I have no idea who these people are. I know some are relatives. There are hundreds of interesting photos.
**So I will put the photos in this blog and make them more interesting than they really are. The photo below: That is my Uncle Harold walking towards the dirigible "Hindenburg". He is a psychic. He is on his way to tell them not to land in Lindenhurst NJ. He had a bad dream about it. How
ever the young ladies in front of him start flirting with him. Uncle Harold is also a ladies man. He never made it to the "Hindenburg". Well, I guess you know the rest of story. Sorry, Paul Harvey.

**Once again, my Uncle Harold is out and about. He can be seen in the back of the boat without his tie. Uncle Oscar, who is rowing and has fallen asleep. It doesn't really matter. As you can clearly see, they are in the middle of apple orchard. Uncle Oscar, who is 5' 1" tall and is a wiry 103 pounds, has found that rowing through an orchard can be very tiring.
"Hey guys, Where is your PFD's?" You don't want to break any laws.

**This next picture is my Great Uncle Mortimer and Great Aunt Jezebel
and Their two kids. We think there were mental problems in this branch of the family tree. Jezebel is holding "Little Blanche" and Mortimer is holding on to "Norman". Ironically, They all had red hair. Even Norman, who we believe was adopted. Norman disappeared one day while out walking in the back pasture. They asked their neighbors, The Lecters, if they had seen "Norm". They said, "We haven't but we will ask our son, Hannibal", who was attending a barbecue at that time. Norm was never seen again.

**The two distinguished looking gentlemen with the hats and overcoats are my uncle Milo on the left and Uncle Percy on the right. These guys could not agree on anything. This picture was taken at 3 am. These guys are on their way to the outhouse. It is a little known fact that they would get all dressed up just to walk to the outhouse. These guys would put on a necktie to fart. Milo thought they should go to town and get their hats blocked and shoes shined before going to the outhouse. Uncle Percy disagreed but deferred to the older Milo. While in
town they decided to have their picture taken. They disagreed whether it should be done indoors or out. As you can see from the photo it was a compromise. either it is really cloudy inside or they put down linoleum outside. I think Uncle Percy dropped a deuce before he made it to the outhouse. He had to many layers of clothes. Hence, the expression on his face. On the back of the picture it says picture taken July 16th, 1912.

**The next photo is a picture of the Barrows Gang when they visited my hometown.
I believe that is Clyde Barrows driving. Bonnie Parker is beside him. Blanche is in the backseat. (She's cute!!!!) Buck Barrows is standing beside the car.
They just robbed the local bank. My Uncle Luther asked if he could take a picture of them. They were more than happy to do so. Then they shot uncle Luther dead. The kids in the photo are little Johnny Dillinger and little Alphonse Capone. I am not sure what kind of car it is. Do you? I know it is not an Austin Healy Sprite.
I have more pictures like this and of course more lies.
Note: Top photo is wet plate collodian process.