Saturday, April 9, 2011

The New reality? The Portly Pia and other Ramblings.



Ok! I just watched a rerun of American Idol.
Yes, I finally get it.  Pia Tuscano was voted off by 13 year old female cellphone users.  We all know how astute the critical judgement of 13 year old hormonally imbalanced females can be. That is why there are 2 girls and 5 guys left.  I suspect that Haley and Lauren will be next.  I can forgive these teenage girls for being 13 year old teenage girls.  AI is, after all is said and done, a popularity contest.

I know Pia will have a very successful career. Remember Jennifer Hudson?

My problem is with a critic.  I am referring to NY Daily News critic Jim Farber, who referred to Pia as "The burly singer". What?  I had to recheck the meaning of the word "burly".  I thought I knew what it meant.

Burly: (of a person) large and strong, heavily built. Large and thick of build. Stout, robust.

Yes,  I do know what it means.

I don't know which event is more shocking.  Pia getting voted off was flabbergasting but I was really flummoxed when Farber referred to Pia as "burly".
Does he have a television?  I did not see a portly Pia, the chubby chanteuse.  I saw a gorgeous lady.  I believe about 98% of American women would be ecstatic if they looked as good as she did.
So I will assume this critic (Farber) has a working television so he saw what I saw.
I am supposed to trust his judgement as a critic?  Really?
This person writes for a living.  He is a wordsmith.  He should choose his words carefully.
The balding, myopic, toothless, bulbed nosed music writer for the New York Daily News should be dragged through Howard Beach, NY by a herd of goats with diarrhea.
What? He has teeth?........whatever!!!
I see what I see and he sees what he sees. Subjective!!!!

Which brings me to my favorite judge on America's Got Talent, Howie Mandell. He was so clueless. He thought this Indian impressionist (Ronith) was hysterical.  Piers thought it was "twaddle".  Howie didn't think that we "got it".  We got it.  Ronith had no talent.
I guess Howie has some Indian blood in him.  He is, after all, an"untouchable".
Howie and Sharon voted for Ronith to go through a couple of times.  Well, what can you expect much from someone whose basic job is to be an translator for Ozzie?  Is Ozzie English? Is that what he is speaking or is it Ozziespeak?

Since I am here, I have a question that has been keeping me awake for many nights.
I realize that "people of color" keep changing their name.  When I grew up they were called "Negroes" (or something worse), now they call themselves "Afro-American".
This is all good. I have no problem with that.  That is not my problem.
My problem is what do they call black people in Canada?  Afro-Canadians?  I don't think so.  My wife spent most of her life in Canada and the term Afro-Canadian never came up.
She is French Canadian and probably lived closer to the North Pole than to Montreal for a few years, so it didn't come up in conversation that much, I suppose.  I suspect they said things like, "Cold, eh!!" and "Sacrebleu".  Another thing about Quebec is every town is
Saint something or other.  There may be a town with that name: "Saint something or other".  They ran out of Saints.
She lived in Saint-Something or other #19 for 2 years.

The little french lady and I watch Househunters International on HGTV.  We thought it would be interesting to live in a different country.  Then she started thinking about it.
"I am getting close to my retirement. We will have to find a country that has a better health care system than the US." she stated.
That cuts it down to about 30 countries in the western hemisphere. Cuba, Belize, Costa Rica, Dominican Republic to name a few. Avoid Haiti.
OK...I'm done.  I will sleep tonight.

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